Is math really important?

This morning, when mom told Claire that it was time for school, Claire said "Yes ma'am.", then sighed and asked "Why do we have to learn?" With a little chuckle, mom replied "So that you can be smart and learn about the things that God created." "Well, why do we have to learn math?" was Claire's next question. Mom then gave the example of "What about when you are cooking and you say 'I have 8 people and each of them eats two corn cobs. How many do I need to make?" Without missing a beat, Claire replied in a deadpan voice "Well, you can just make 100 and freeze the rest."

So much for math, right?

Do you believe in Santa??

My brother sent me this the other day; it was too funny not to share with y'all :)

I. There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau).

At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.

II. Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

III. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--- Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

IV. 600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance --- this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake.

The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accellerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

100+ things I am thankful for

Happy (late) Thanksgiving all! I hope you had a wonderful time, as I did. What did y'all do? We went to one of our friends house, along with some other people. I also went Black Friday shopping with some friends, which was loads of fun. Anyway, I made a list of 100+ things that I am thankful for, here it is:

1. the LORD

2. my parents

3. Stephen

4. Shea

5. Claire

6. Samuel

7. Philip

8. Abigail

9. my other relatives

10. salvation

11. grace

12. mercy

13. God’s creation

14. coffee (esp. black)

15. dark chocolate

16. playing harp

17. my goats

18. my dog and cat

19. friends

20. our church

21. our house

22. cameras

23. cute coats

24. jewelry

25. baking

26. health

27. gourmet food

28. the bible

29. Dad’s godly council

30. Mom’s sacrifices

31. Stephen’s joyful countenance

32. Shea’s helpful nature

33. Claire’s giving spirit

34. Samuel’s smiles

35. Philip’s hugs and kisses

36. Abigail’s laugh

37. driving

38. curling irons & flat irons

39. sewing

40. books

41. our christian forefathers

42. our fifteen-passenger van

43. polka dots

44. flowers

45. cowboy boots

46. music

47. the ability to sing (not necessarily well)

48. bonfires

49. God’s provision

50. conferences

51. traveling

52. my Donald Duck voice (because it helps entertain little children so well ;P)

53. email

54. thrift stores

55. blue corn chips (I know it’s really crazy, but I love them)

56. cheese (love that too...)

57. sunglasses

58. people who are not afraid to correct me when I am in sin

59. people who either have mentored or are mentoring me

60. goat’s milk ice cream (esp. the making-it part)

61. Dad and Shea’s Lemon Curd (seriously, that stuff is amazing)

62. tea cups/teapots (I have a collection going)

63. scarves

64. the process of sanctification (although it does hurt)

65. God using every situation to teach us something

66. family worship

67. the girls’ mentoring group that we sometimes have after church

68. the mountains

69. the beach

70. autumn leaves

71. our prayer meetings

72. board games (like Quelf ;P)

73. big purses (because I keep everything in my purse)

74. dishwashers

75. changing seasons (spring, summer, fall, winter)

76. the cross

77. the ability to memorize scripture

78. water

79. swing dancing

80. God always answering my prayers (and knowing what’s best for me)

81. medicine

82. the Holy Spirit

83. not always getting what I want

84. babies

85. ribbons

86. my kindle

87. trials that make us realize how blessed we really are

88. candles (although I don’t like them as much as Stephen does)

89. swimming

90. picture frames

91. christmas trees

92. braces (because they can correct my bad teeth)

93. being a poor, deprived (that was sarcastic, btw) homeschooler

94. Mom’s lemon & lime trees (they have not produced anything yet, but they have survived everything that a lemon and lime tree possibly could)

95. the coffee bar in our house

96. school

97. America

98. our farm-fresh eggs

99. rain (most of the time)

100. knitting

101. crocheting

102. flip-flops

103. edifying conversations

104. my adopted aunts and uncles

105. God never being finished molding me into His likeness

106. wisdom

107. many, many other things...

G.G.'s 92nd birthday party

As I mentioned earlier, a few weekends ago, my family, with the exception of my dad, drove up to NY to celebrate my great-grandmother's 92nd birthday. There was a lot of the Faranda (my mom's mom's side) family there; and it was great to see everyone again.

All of the great-grandchildren

L-R Top: Sarah, Kylie

L-R Second Row: John Ryan, Shea, Joseph, Emma, Me

L-R Third Row: Sam, Thomas, Megan, Catherine, Jessica, Connor (the baby that I'm holding)

L-R Bottom: Riley, Pip, Stephen, Miss B (Abigail), Claire

Uncle Tim and Me serving the cake

Ooh... Paper airplanes, what fun!

Cutie pies, Claire, Sam and Joseph

The birthday girl with Abigail

My grandma and all of her family: Us (minus dad), and Aunt Gina & Uncle John

Me and my "Bestest friend" (Not a great pic of me, just sayin')

My little buddy

I received the privilege of holding Connor for the group photo of the great-grandchildren; there were lots of eager arms ready to take him, but somehow, I was chosen :)

I showed some of the children pictures of my animals

Stephen and Stephen (Uncle Steve)

I just had to post this pic; doesn't my great-grandfather look like Mr. Fredrickson from Up? With the balloons and the cane and the glasses?

Oma, Shea, G.G., Me, Mom

A classic "Me" photo

Two very different cooking experiences

These are two of my recent cooking experiments (as in, I tried a new recipe); the outcomes were very different, one good, the other... ahem... not so much.

The first was supposed to be a cheesecake (the key word is supposed). Now, I love to try new things; be they recipes, foods or other things. So, when I was supposed to make a cheesecake for dessert, naturally I chose a new recipe. I was supposed to put the pan in another pan filled with water, but I didn't wrap the pan in aluminum foil, so the water seeped into the crust. Then, while the cheesecake was baking, the power went out... so the cheesecake was sitting in the oven, only partly baked. About an hour later, the power came back on, and I continued to bake the cheesecake- for a lot longer than the time it usually needed, and still would not bake all the way. A little later, mom pulled out the oven rack and found out that the cheesecake was still not cooked in the middle... by spilling it all over herself. Yes sir, she spilled it all down her skirt (thankfully it wasn't that hot) and all over the floor. A little bit stayed in the pan, so we baked it for a little bit longer until it was finally done. Because the water had seeped into the pan, the crust was really chewy, the whole cheesecake was actually not very good ;) So, we didn't eat it; at all.

The second was peppermint ice cream- made with my goat's milk. It was so good...

An Inheritance Incorruptible

1 Peter 1:3-5

New King James Version (NKJV)

³ Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, ⁴ to an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled and that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, ⁵ who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.

McDonalds at 10? PM?

A few weeks ago (Yeah, I know that was a while ago and I was going to post this sooner, but didn't get around to it until now), my family embarked on a great adventure into the land of McDonalds. The night started out as any other ordinary night would with Dad, Mom, Stephen, Shea and I gathered at the table at about 9pm, having a discussion. You see, as long as Stephen is engaged in the conversation, he is fine; as soon as he is quiet and not saying anything, he falls asleep. That is one of the things that I love about my brother, he can fall asleep anywhere, in a matter of minutes. Anyway, Stephen proceeds to fall asleep and I take out my pen and draw on his hand and forehead... he didn't wake up. We kept talking when, a few minutes later, Stephen randomly mumbled "I want another peanut butter cookie; can I have one?". Mom and I start to laugh, then mom decided to play along so she said to him, "Hey Stephen, I'm really craving a frappe and fries from McDonalds, will you take me there to get some?". He replied with, "Sure I'll take you, but I can't drive", then mom said, "That's OK, I can drive" "Oh, when do you want to go?" "Right now" "Oh, OK", then he was silent. (fyi, mom wasn't really craving anything, she just said that to be funny) Then, a little later, at almost 10pm, mom said, "Buddy, you ready to go?" "Huh? Oh, where?" Remember, you promised me fries and a frappe." "Oh yeah, I'm almost ready, just let me get my shoes on", and he walked off into his room. Now all of us thought that he would end up in his bed, but he came back out, ready to go. Well, Dad said that we really should go, if only for a story to tell. Then mom asked Stephen, "Are you really awake?", he scoffed "Of course I am!" Then he grabbed the key to the Suburban and started walking to the door, when he then turned back around and gave the keys to dad, saying "Here, you can take these, I don't want them anymore", and on our way out to the car, he ran into it twice. So I hopped in the driver's seat and pulled out once everyone is in the car. A few minutes down the road, mom turned to Stephen and asked, "Did you bring your billfold?". He groggily replied, "Yes ma'am; I think I have about $200 in there." "$200??!! What on earth do you need $200 for? What are you planning to buy?" I wanted to know. "Umm... I think that there is a gas station right next to McDonalds, and they have some pretty good stuff over there." Mom and I laughed the whole way to McDonalds. Literally. And Stephen was sleeping. Again. When we pulled up at McDonalds, Stephen awoke from his slumber to exclaim, "WOW!! McDonalds?? Cool! Why are we here?? Is it the next day?" Oh. My. Goodness. I have not laughed so hard in forever. So, that was our adventure for the night. You can ask Stephen about it; he doesn't remember a thing. (I did procure Stephen's permission for posting this, but he really, really does not want to have to endure teasing about the incident)

Having Fun with Aunt Gina

Yesterday, we arrived in VA, at my grandmother's house, and are leaving with her to go to NY on Saturday for my great grandmother's 92nd birthday party. Last night, we went with my Aunt Gina to drop off a couch at her friends house. On the way back to her house, she drove our 15-passenger van, a whole lot bigger and not quite as stylish as her typical ride-- a stick-shift BMW. At one point, she turned the windshield wipers on and didn't know how to turn them off again. When she tried, they kept going faster... it was really funny ;)

After we arrived (safely) at her house, we had nuts for a snack. Aunt Gina told me that she fed her dog, Pilot, a nut from her mouth to teach him how to kiss her, and she said that I could try too. So, here is my attempt at getting "Pi kisses".

This is my first attempt at uploading a video, so please tell me if it doesn't work

Out of the mouth of babes

I just posted this on the family blog, but thought I would post it here too; so if you have read this on the family blog, you don't have to read it again here, just to make me feel good...

In our family we love apples and try to always keep them in stock. So, this afternoon, Claire was getting herself an apple to eat, and wanted it cut up. We own a little gadget that cores and slices your apple for you... with enough pressure applied to the top. Claire couldn't push hard enough, so she employed mom to push it down for her. Mom did it really easily as Claire looked up in amazement and said "Wow mom! You weigh a lot!!" Yeah... we all had a pretty good laugh over that, except for Claire, who was wondering what was so funny. See, I told you that something funny happens literally everyday with me around. It is not necessarily because of me (though a lot of times it is), but it happens with me there; life seems to calm down when I'm not around ;)

(This was posted with full permission from mom and Claire)